17 reasons that I suspect I may possibly be a bit ADHD
A few weeks ago I was told to look up the attributes of adult ADHD - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. As I read, I couldn't help but see myself in the articles and the realization that I was not alone. This helped me to better understand why I do some of the things that I do and why I do not do some of the things that I do not do. And because I have chosen quilting to be the the thing that I am most obsessive about, I see the attention deficit and the hyperactivity played out in my quilt room. Okay, it is evident in other areas of my life, but this blog post is about quilting.
Here are 17 reasons to suggest that this quilter just might be a bit ADHD. Why 17? No particular reason, except that I think it is a great prime number. There are lots more symptoms on the list but this is not a psychological research paper, although the more I study counseling the more I am convinced that quilting should be on the official counseling theories list.
1. Creative.
Quilters are extremely creative. Just think about the beautiful works of art and bed covers quilters have created with needle and thread on fabric over the last 200-300 years. Those who are right brain functioning, the ones who do not follow the rules, who colour outside the lines using the rainbow for a colour pallet, they are the ones who create new designs and patterns. Those of us who are more left brain, follow the rules the quilt police have established. I like sampler quilts with neat rows and columns, balance and symmetry and I am colour challenged when it comes to choosing colours for a new project.
2. Impulsive.
Quilters love to start new projects. We sign up for classes to make the newest patterns and learn the newest techniques and buy the newest gadgets and the newest collections of fabric. I start new projects with great energy and excitement to the exclusion of all else. I love to have several projects on the go. As a left brained colour challenged quilter, I have difficulty deciding which colours to pull together, so I love fat quarter bundles. I buy lots, especially when they are on sale. I have a project in mind for every collection I have purchased. Not sure how much I need for a background? Buy the whole bolt. Most shops give a discount if you finish the bolt.
3. Disorganized.
All that fabric I buy has to be put somewhere. I once had a quilt teacher who cataloged every piece of fabric she bought in several notes book listing how much yardage she had, where she bought it and how much she paid for it. Mostly I just quickly stash the bags in the closet, under the table, or in the laundry awaiting preshrinking. Not everyone has a room designated specifically for quilting like me, except that I have two rooms and a hall closet. I used to set up my machine on the kitchen table in days gone by, but we did have to eat everyday, somewhere.
4. Forgetful.
Because I am somewhat disorganized, I misplace many gadgets or cannot remember where they are, so I buy more. I do not remember what is in my stash so I buy more. When I have had to de-clutter and organize my work space, I put projects into neat boxes, labeled, with all the fabric and patterns needed to complete the quilt. I have come to realize that if I cannot see it . . . it does not exist . . . therefore . . . it is easy to forget how many (37 . . . no wait . . . I started 2 new ones last month) un-finished quilts I have and start a new one with great energy and excitement. Therefore, in order to not forget, I have a notebook that lists every quilt I have ever started, when I started it, when I completed it and who I gave it to. Just so I do not forget, I often pull it out and review or re-write the list and then get overwhelmed at how many unfinished quilts I have, so I write a list of which quilts I am going to finish in the coming year, one per month seems like a reasonable goal.
5. Easily distracted.
I often have an inability to focus and stay attentive.
6. Obsessive.
I tend to focus on one thing and forget about everything else. I see cute cartoony pictures on facebook that make fun of our quilting obsessions and yet, it really is not funny when I add them all the up and realize how many describe me and my behaviours. I scored 20 on the ADHD-I list.
7. Extreme mental activity.
There are so many nights I lay awake drafting a pattern, systematically organizing how I will approach teaching how to make the blocks or how I would re-orgaanize my bookshelves and quilting room and then replay the same scenario over and over. I would sit for hours at a time looking at the Dear Jane quilt on my design wall and how I would approach some of the blocks on my next bright coloured one. Sometimes I think I spend more time thinking about the process than it would actually take to do it.
8. Substance abuse.
Pretty much anything with sugar in it . . . and chocolate . . . or buying more books . . . or fabric . . . or gadgets . . .
9. Inability to complete projects.
It's not that I do not complete quilts, but rather that I take on some of the more challenging projects like Dear Jane. I impulsively invited several friends to join me in the journey of making this quilt four years ago and it is purely coincidental that I impulsively started a masters in theological studies at the same time, went to India four times that year and attended my son's wedding, on time, all the while milking cows every day and then started my first Baltimore quilt. I did graduate last year and impulsively started a doctor of Christian counseling program, but only after retiring from milking. Sometimes I forget all that I have on the go and dream of starting a new quilt.
10. Procrastination.
I have come to realize that in my fear of failure, of not doing it good enough, of possibly being criticized for less than perfection, I avoid the pain of thinking about the pain that is involved with trying to do too much at the last minute and wait until the last minute and then do the thing poorly in a hurry and then criticize myself for doing such a poor job of something that I know I am good at. So . . . I procrastinate . . . I started this post 2 months ago and kept putting off completing it. Also, I cannot function in the clutter . . . but am too disorganized to know how to bring order to that clutter. . . so I will go and read blogs or play games and avoid doing anything useful or, plan to start a new quilt.
11. Anxiety issues.
This kind of mentality is a great environment for anxiety issues and has led me to depression. I could avoid a lot of stress if I learned how to pace myself and actually followed the detailed, colour coded to do lists I write for myself.
12. Verbal hyperactivity.
I have been told that I do not have ADHD because I do not physically bounce off the walls in hyper activity.
I can go off on verbal tangents as I engage in hyperactive dialogue, or rather monologue. I have come to realize that I love an audience of one. But then, sometimes I am the only one talking . . . about my favourite topic . . . me . . . and what I am doing.
13. Low self esteem.
14. Financial stress.
My husband seldom ever looks at the Visa statement, but one day recently he asked what did this mean? paypalpaypalpaypalpaypal? for . . . what is this? $900? I pay off the credit card every month, pay no interest and travel the world with the airmiles our farm business collects. I am not stressed financially, but I sure could be the way I spend money on fabric and books, forgetting what I bought the day before. And, I love sales and freebies. My downloads file is filled with hundreds of free patterns.
15. Sleep disorders.
Extreme mental activity, anxiety issues, substance abuse . . . it isn't any wonder that I have been diagnosed with sleep apnea.
16. Poor time management.
Quilters with ADHD tend to be goal oriented and tend to create
such unrealistic goals and lists that we cannot follow them through, so
we start a new quilt . . . because . . . it is exciting.
17. Creative.
Quilters are extremely creative. Just think about the beautiful works
of art and bed covers quilters have created with needle and thread on
fabric over the last 200-300 years. Those who are right brain
functioning, the ones who do not follow the rules, who colour outside
the lines using the rainbow for a colour pallet, they are the ones who
create new designs and patterns. Those of us who are more left brain,
follow the rules the quilt police have established. We like sampler
quilts with neat rows and columns, balance and symmetry and are colour
challenged when it comes to choosing colours for a new project. Some
quilters start and complete one project at a time. Not me. I love the
energy and the adrenalin rush of starting yet another new quilt project.
Bless your heart,
Chris